Loan sharking will die

 

I'm alone. Fighting the vampires. Not Zeca's. Those who abused my mother and do not accept that they cannot continue to do so. I was always being disrespected, my life being served on a silver platter in the house of vampires who, not satisfied with sucking my mother's blood that is blood of the same blood, trying to silence me, tie me up, diminish me, as a way of fitting into the pettiness of their standards.

The exercise of understanding the whys has been strenuous. When you don't know the whole story, you waste a lot of time building puzzles.

Names are not necessary, since, in my opinion, vampires have no name, they are only vampires, not distinguishing themselves from each other in their mutual pretensions.My mother was always despised by the family. Misery formerly produced this in droves. He continues to do so, but today it becomes more difficult to be an anonymous orphan, in the face of the institutions elaborated, some to help the subject and others to determine his steps. Zeca's vampires are in these institutions, fed by the system that sponsors them. The banks are where the larger vampires hide and suck the blood of humans with legal avidity. Under the cover of the civil code. But it's not banks I'm going to talk to you about.

My mother graduated, against all expectations, because she wanted to escape the manipulation of the system that in her situation, foresaw that another miserable woman would come - she did not stop being miserable, but she was miserable because of the need to have someone who loved her. He always had an excellent salary, considering that to everyone who gave him more work, he didn't know how to say no and knew that no could bring him unpleasantness.The was not safeguarded only for his children. And he said yes to everyone, amen to everyone. The family of her blood that kept her colonized by her choice, still reveals itself against her today. My mother says it's ironic that they pretend to like her. That since 1975 he has been borrowing money from them, to be able to help them, knowing that they bring him high interest rates, with the value predicted by the banks. But her family is not a bank. All their lives, she says, they always counted on her money, her interest, when they invited her to lunches, if she, for any reason, could not or did not want to go, the "boss", her brother-in-law would call her: so sister-in-law, aren't you coming? And my mother would tell him: don't worry about the interest, because I'm going to pay you, I just can't go there today. 

He had never told us anything about this. I knew it in 2013 the hard way.

In November 2012, my mother was hospitalized with an ait and was very ill, so much so that she was advised to put in the papers for retirement. And he signed them in the hospital bed. The vampires, afraid that she would not pay them the debt (a debt she contracted to be able to buy a house in the village), warned me that my husband and I would have to sign a debt document, assuring them that they would receive the money that my mother asked them to stubbornly buy the farm next to mine,  here, at this end of the world. She knew at that time that they predicted her death and afraid that this would happen, they thought, not in the love they had for her, that she would not even dare to die with a debt of 23 thousand euros.  The following year, on my mother's birthday, everyone attended, all the vampires, the children of the vampires, the grandchildren of the vampires for my mother's birthday to be held in the three miguéis. I asked my mother if she had invited them all. Because every lunch my mother made, she was always the one who paid for everyone. She told me: No Cristina, I only invited my sister and brother-in-law. I called the man who was married to my mother's sister and asked him: don't you have shame on your face? Are you coming here with your whole family for my mother to buy you lunch and you charge her five hundred euros every month just in interest? What the fuck is this?

And he was not prepared for my attitude, he began to stutter and said out loud: Sister-in-law, don't worry that this month you don't pay me any interest, this is my gift for your birthday. And I even said to him: Of course, the poisoned gift. He doesn't pay interest because he's going to pay his whole family's lunch bill. My mother asked me to shut up. I kept silent. But my thoughts are never silent. And so it was, my mother continued to live with vampires, because they were vampires in her family, they had to be special. And at that time, a cousin of mine, who belonged to the vampire family, said to me: Don't trust them. They talk about your life every Sunday at lunch, your life is served as entertainment. This cousin of mine was never a vampire. She was the only one with whom I have always identified. He has long since left. 

Vampires do not accept weaning. They hang on to her and humiliate her, they say that she was involved with her children, with her nephews, when the poor thing was not even at home, they hung in our house for everything, to eat, to date with the maids and the unemployed, it was all more of the same. My mother was not at home, because she worked 24 hours a day, today I know that it was to escape the to the constant mourning of his life and to pay the interest they set him. And when she had free time, she spent spoiling her children, she spent it for the sake of spending and, as she told me recently, it was a way to help her vampire sister who had helped her pay for her course, giving her food and guaranteeing her eternal vassalage. At the last of the family lunches, they even told her that my mother's favorite sister wanted to drown my mother, as a way of antagonizing her, because her vampire sister doesn't like my mother's favorite sister. My mother has always been mother Joana, mother of the sick, paying them clothes and buying them gifts without charging the Conde de Ferreira hospital where she remained a nurse for decades, well beyond retirement. My mother's house was the house of mother Joana, who was absent.All my life I remember them hanging there and because of what I thought, I addicted my children to also live with vampires. At Christmas it was mandatory to go there to spend the feast of Christ with the vampires. Were they not to rise up against their progeny.

These vampires are the same ones that exist in society under a cloak of kindness and Catholicism. They eat the host, but as soon as they leave their churches, they return to the same place, because they feel anointed with Christian faith, forgiven for the alms they gave, for the kiss they gave to the unknown brother next to them, for the parroting of prayers and "humility". Catholic vampires believe that no one reads them. And I am petrified to see them rehearse double steps, in an attempt to colonize me and others like me.No, I don't live with vampires, but the one who denounced them was my mother who, as a way of feeling more inside the family, promoted the bloodletting of which they are the authors. And of all that you produce, of the ingloriousness, the lack of love, the lack of understanding, the inhumanity, I add that as long as the current status quo promotes usury on the socially vulnerable (in this case, a widow with three children to support), inhumanity grows under the angelic appearance of kindness. It's a lot of hypocrisy and I didn't come into the world to support it. 

There is a lack of vertical attitudes, but not on my part. I can continue to fight windmills. But you will not pass by me without my denunciation. And refuse to fraternize with those who do not add me, on the contrary, it only drains my energy from conviviality. I got tired of the observation and study of vampires. I dream of a world where values are other than control, lies, superficiality and usurpation.

Here is my text as an act of contestation. I'm not from any herd. I am a person with eyes and with a heart. No, I'm not fooled! I know how to read people.